With the next one, gawk if you want to

I haven't linked up to the Breastfeeding Blog Hop in a while. This week's topic, Nursing in Public, has been a popular one! If you would like to share your experiences nursing in public (NIP), link up! Be sure to visit the other links listed below; there are some great posts this week!

I am so ashamed of myself for the annoyed glances I gave, and the "CAN YOU BELIEVE HER?" comments I made about nursing mothers before becoming one myself. The comment I most often made was, "I don't care that she's feeding her child, but can't she cover up?" Oh to be so naive!
Unfortunately, I continued to feel the same way when I had Gabriel. I was nervous about offending others, and couldn't shake the fear of accidentally exposing myself. Plus, no one in my family (with the exception of my SIL) had breastfed, so I just felt all-around uncomfortable about nursing in front of others right from the start.
Despite my nervousness, we nursed in front of some visitors after returning home from the hospital, and in the homes of family members. I used a cover, and hated it!  I wasn't good at situating him and getting him latched on while under the cover. So to avoid flashing, I would go to another room, get situated, and then come back. That was a pain in the rear.
As soon as he learned how to flail his tiny arms around, it just became impossible to cover up. Since I was still so self-conscious about exposing myself, I decided to just give bottles of expressed milk while we were on the go. I'm so mad at myself for that decision. I'd like to go back in time and slap the old me for being so foolishly insecure. I wish that instead of leaving the room to nurse in private, that I'd stayed put and felt confident in my ability to feed my baby in the most natural way possible.
Now I'm an exclusive pumper (you can read about why here.) and it's too late for my new take on nursing in public. I have big plans for my next baby though. I'll be holding my head high and nursing in public without fear of what others think. I want to make it clear that I have no plans of running around topless, but I'm not going to be concerned about the possibility of a slip here or there. Who cares if someone sees me feeding my child? It won't be featured in an adult film somewhere. It is simply the natural, God-given ability to nourish my child.
The last few times I've seen other mommas NIP, I made it a point to shoot them a smile. You should have seen the smiles these women gave back. They felt encouraged, supported, excited... not ashamed like many people make nursing moms feel. I also had the opportunity to defend a woman that was quite a bit exposed at the mall after someone made my old, "Can't she cover up?!" comment. It was strange how quickly the subject was dropped when I responded, "I think it's wonderful that she doesn't feel like it's necessary to hide. Afterall, she's just feeding her baby."
Have you shot a smile at a momma nursing in public, or had an opportunity to defend one? I'd love to hear your story!

I'll leave you with a cartoon a friend of mine posted on facebook. It gave me a good laugh, and I hope it does for you as well!

Swing Low, Sweet Chariot

This post is my contribution to The Breastfeeding Blog Hop hosted by Life with Levi, Slacker Mom, and Diary of a Devil Dog Wife. Feel free to link up, and please visit the other blogs listed below to share some BFing love!!

I had to laugh when I saw the topic for this week, Body Changes.

One of my closest friends breastfed her two kids, and really is one of only a few people I know that has breastfed. She by default then, became my go to person for all BFing related questions. We had a conversation somewhat recently about our bodies after pregnancy and BFing.  It started with me asking about whether her "ladies" went back to their normal size after she was through BFing, and ended when her husband so very lovingly threw in his two cents- "Swing low, sweet chariot!" We all had a good laugh about it, and continued on with our evening. Since then, I've gone back and forth with whether I really find that funny. Most days- yes, it's hilarious! It's a fun way to appreciate a piece of my new identity, battle scars if you will. In all seriousness though, it's a small price to pay for the well being of my precious little boy. There are other days however, that I'm pretty peeved about the ladies swinging low....and I'm sure if it's bad now, it's really going to be bad when I stop breastfeeding, and worse after future nurslings. Yikes! As depressing as "swing low, sweet chariots" can be, there are a few things that make me feel better as I stand completely bare in front of the mirror, and try to lift the ladies back up where they used to stand during their former glory. First, is that my problem isn't anything my good friend Vicky doesn't have a secret solution to. One trip to her place and I'll be a hot, confident Momma! Second, and most importantly, my husband has a such an appreciation for them it's difficult to not feel proud!

So maybe, just maybe, "swing low sweet chariot" can be funny all the time??

Why I'm Moooing

This post is my contribution to The Breastfeeding Blog Hop hosted by Life with Levi, The Slacker Mom, and Diary of a Devil Dog Wife. This week'ss topic is pumping. Feel free to link up, and please visit the other blogs listed below to share some BFing love!!

From the beginning, I didn't find breastfeeding all that difficult. We did have some latching issues in the hospital, but with the help of a nipple shield we got off to a great start! My milk came in (phew!), his latch caught on (finally!), and I reached my first initial goal (3 months). Success!

While pregnant, I had decided that love it or hate it, I would at least nurse for 3 months. So when that milestone rolled around, I set my next goal- 1 year. Things were going so well that I knew I'd make it to a year easy. Then it hit- the nursing strike. No matter what I tried, my darling little 4 month old screamed bloody murder at the sight of my breast. Everything I read said to be patient and keep trying...but not to be pushy. So I'd offer, he'd scream, and I would give him a bottle. My breast pump became my best friend, and I felt like a failure. I reminded myself daily that he was still getting my milk, and that was all that mattered; my broken heart felt otherwise. I missed the emotional aspect of nursing, and felt like i should be mooing as I pumped away my day.

During the month and a half I tried to work through the strike, we had just a handful of nursing sessions, each in the bathtub. I know the warm water relaxed both of us and calmed the mountain of stress I was carrying on my back. I could tell he found comfort in nursing, and that made our situation much harder on me. I considered our tub sessions a step in the right direction, but it wasn't long before they became screaming sessions instead. I finally decided that a month and a half of being rejected was all I had in me, and threw in the towel.

I realized though that since I'd already been pumping that whole time, there really was nothing keeping me from continuing. After doing a little research online, I was quickly empowered by the number of moms committed to exclusively pumping. (which is how i was introduced to Life with Levi's, Jen!)
Gabriel is 7 months old now, and I'm as determined as ever to make it to one year! Now that I have a good routine, and have become creative with when and where I pump, it's really not that big of a deal. I enjoy knowing I'm doing the best i can for my son. Sure I still feel a little like mooing.
MOOOOOooooooo!
That feels better.